There are rare days when I find myself feeling deeply, for no clear reason. There are no major issues or problems, no particular matters I am struggling with. And yet I have moments of strange, deep emotions. If they were joyful, then probably they would be of no worry or concern to me. But just as often they are of more maudlin or melancholic in nature.
But as I walk through the foggy minutes and sometimes hours of inexplicable emotions, I’ve come to realize that perhaps there isn’t anything particularly strange about these moments. That these episodes are okay. Yeah, I suppose Mr. Fil-Chi gets #feels moments that arise out of nowhere. Moments of deep, moving emotion, and not just during socially acceptable instances such as weddings (where this hasn’t happened for me), but even the most mundane of things such as a simple car ride.
And I have come to accept and understand that it is fine to feel deeply. If the Lord God, incarnate in flesh, can weep and feel deeply for many things, so can I. Many of the significant figures of the bible and history have been shown to experience an entire breadth of emotions, ranging from joy to sorrow.
I don’t know sometimes what purpose being able to feel and express all these emotions will have. No doubt there are beneficial things to it, of course. But I haven’t quite gotten to that point yet where I can clearly declare and acknowledge them. Perhaps in time, as God provides through experiences and wisdom, I shall appreciate it better.
For now though, sure, I’d like to get to know myself better.